Plural Trees, Lagomorphic Dæs, Alien Superheroes and Other Curiosities
Jun. 3rd, 2026 10:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
liondrakesI've been wanting to be more active on Dreamwidth, but I haven't had the time as of lately. Thankfully, I'm off today.
There's new developments in my life that I've been meaning to touch on.
Projects & Plans
There's new developments in my life that I've been meaning to touch on.
Projects & Plans
- Ungovernable! Meta-tations on Fictionhood
- At long last, I've reached the final draft of my fictionkin zine! I'm excited to re-read and revise its content. I've participated in a few zines, but this is my first time making one of my own.
- The zine will be free! A printable version of it will be provided as well.
- I think I'm going to publish it through Heyzine. Originally, I wanted to post the zine on itch.io but I'm not as confident about that platform anymore. Although I still support zines and other works on itch.io, the platform itself isn't trustworthy especially with its censorship in mind.
- Future Zine Ideas
- "Sayo is Super(man): Gender & Fictionkinity," another fictionkin zine. I want to focus on the ways in which my gender identity contrasts with that of my fictotypes and how my transness, especially my rejection of gender binaries, influences my fictionhood.
- "Another World", another alterfictional zine. Rather than focus on fictionkinity, I want to focus on neural narrative visitations and travels I've made through fiction. Some accounts will focus on recent travels (like The Ghost in the Shell and The Twelve Kingdoms). Some accounts will focus on travels I took when I was a kid but didn't quite realize were interdimensional travels.
- 18+/NSFW: "Bit & Bulldagger," a ponyplay zine. If I come around to making this zine, I want to focus on the connection between my nonhumanity (as a draft horse) and my experiences as a newbie pony. I'd also like to discuss my explorations into kink as a black, acespec lesbian. An intersectional read for sure!
- Essays in Progress
- The Art of Making Something Out of Nothing: Verza Linking and Self-Made Lore: This essay adds onto a tumblr post I made about my verza linktype and the lore I've created around it. Not only are some of the details revised, there's new lore I've been wanting to write about. Shedding light on otherlinking and imagithropy is an added bonus. I started this essay a couple of months ago, but I keep forgetting to finish it. I'll likely publish it on Tumblr first, then cross-post it here.
- Chasing A Tiara Worn By All: Tiara Umamusume, Gender And Me: This is an essay I started last year but lost the momentum to continue. I want to complete it, though. Gender as a topic of alterhumanity interests me a lot. My umamusume vaguetype influenced not only my nonhumanity but my perspective on gender as a horse. I want this to be both a love letter to the stories of racemares and myself as I navigate my gender identity. There's one downside: I'm aware that some folks are against Umamusume because of its roots with horse racing. While they hold a right to their opinions, I'm not compromising my identity for the sake of others' comforts.
- My reasoning? I've sat through an entire media storm of people woobifying slave owners like George Washington and Thomas Jefferson simply bc a.) they were played by black men and b.) "Lin-Manuel Miranda rap good!". The same can be said about Our Flag Means Death, concerning the depiction and woobification of one Stede Bonnet. I hardly saw Tumblr up in arms then. While those men are dead, I can list several examples of slavery as an industry not being dead at all in our world. Despite my gripes with both works of fiction, I'd never judge someone who has them as fictomeres. It becomes a very complicated subject when personal identity is involved, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t acknowledge it. That's to say: I think some alterhumans will survive seeing anime horse girls and people with alterfictional ties to them in their communities.
- If the anxiety eats away at me, I’ll just post it on Dreamwidth and upload it on my website without another word.
- Scrapping Old Essays / Writing
- Soon, I want to go through previous writings and delete some of them.
- On one hand, there's still a bit of nostalgia in those writings. I had so much more to say and discover. On the other hand, I've changed a lot over the course of four years. I don't feel like those writings represent me. Not anymore, at least. I'm indifferent to purging my work. It may be a loss, but it lightens my load.
- Plurality
- The Net (it/they) is becoming adjusted in our shared headspace. How they choose to communicate with me is interesting. Since it doesn't speak verbally, it communicates from a digital interface and types out its comments or insights. At first, I couldn't parse what it was saying at all because it communicated through binary. Trying to remember the placement of each 0 and 1 and translate their speech wasn't working out, so they switched to an English language server (as they called it). So far, it's worked for the both of us.
- My theory of the Net being a living organism was partially correct. It is a living organism, but it's more of a sapient environment than an animal. Very cool.
- Daemonism
- Olumide is back and with a settled form!
- Hi~! A while ago, a couple of you may recognize me as that shiny little snake who'd chat sometimes in OtherConnect. I was also named Maxwell for a bit. I've been it all: a sunbeam snake, a horned viper, an emperor scorpion and a bird of paradise. All of 'em were very fun! I also took a bit of break, but before you know it, BAM! I wake up, and I see I'm a jackrabbit! Well... at least I thought my form was. After a bit of researching, we scouted out my actual settled form: an african savanna hare! Hey, close enough. Jackrabbits are still hares!
- You might be thinkin', "Mimi, how the hell did you go from snakes and scorpions to a damn hare?!" Simple. I'll mellowed out a little. I'm still as sharp-tongued as ever, but I noticed my friend here has been maturin’ lately so I figured it was high-time I buckle up and do the same time. This form may lack some bells and whistles, but it feels real good!
- Fictionkinity
- I've started to omit some of my parallel lives from my kinlist. I am relieved, but I also grieve what once was. It's not that I was never any of these people, far from it. It's that I feel like our lives have grown so distant from each other that saying we're the same person no longer feels applicable. Sometimes, I see imagery from their sources and think: "That was me once." Granted, none of my current parallel lives are dead where they are. They're simply out of my orbit, drifting farther and farther away from the person I am in this world.
- Not all parallel lives will be omitted. There's still a couple of parallel lives that are intertwined with me, thus we are wholly the same person. My parallel life as a gold dragon, and me being a gold dragon by extension, remains a part of my draconity. That said, it is no longer the core part of my draconity. I'd argue being a sun dragon (i.e. my Elios fictotype) has taken its place in that regard.
- My parallel life as an X-Man is the worst loss from the previous bulletpoint. I am a mutant. I don't want to stop being a mutant, despite the strife it's given me and my headmates in said life. Furthermore, I'm not only losing my identity in this detachment. I may stand to lose my friends— the Chorus, a subsystem from said life— as they've been quiet for some months now, despite trying to facilitate communication. I don't think there's a high chance of them coming back, especially when they are tied to Miracle's headspace and not mine. I had a creeping feeling that this was one of the lives I've been distanced from. I was in denial about it, and I really wish I wasn't at the time. It's gone now. They're gone now. I hardly know what to do with myself knowing this.
- This is the first time I've created a copinglink specifically for alterhuman coping. One of my past gateway visitors was another version of me from the Marvel Universe: a beyonder. He wasn't half-mutant and/or half-inhuman like some versions of The Beyonder, but he wasn't The Beyonder of Earth-616 either. He just happened to be a member of the Beyonder civilization. This past interaction gave me an idea (and another example for why imagithropy comes in handy).
- To cope with the loss of this specific parallel life, I decided to link a canon-divergent version of The Beyonder. This Beyonder would be half-mutant and half-beyonder. My origins would start with a rogue beyonder looking to lay low from his overseeing superiors, befriending a neighboring (mutant) woman and later starting a family with her before his true identity is discovered. Their child (me/my linktype) would then grow up assuming he is only a mutant, but as he receives his education from Xavier's, he soon learns he is more. He is a mutant and a beyonder, but not just any beyonder. THE Beyonder. (Cheesy, I know but Marvel wouldn't be Marvel without its cheese.)
- Absolute Superman, Hikaru Shidou and Rayearth are all fictotypes I've sat on questioning for over a year. It took establishing my own canons and doing some personal psychology for me to accept this. I feel a lot like how I felt when I kinfirmed Elios: "Why didn't I do this sooner?" My answer? I am my own biggest critic.
- I've started to omit some of my parallel lives from my kinlist. I am relieved, but I also grieve what once was. It's not that I was never any of these people, far from it. It's that I feel like our lives have grown so distant from each other that saying we're the same person no longer feels applicable. Sometimes, I see imagery from their sources and think: "That was me once." Granted, none of my current parallel lives are dead where they are. They're simply out of my orbit, drifting farther and farther away from the person I am in this world.
- Nonhumanity
- Local equine, who spends most of his time being a big ass horse, learns he is also a big ass. More news at 9.
Currently Reading / Watching
For my next off day, I plan on starting Ghost in the Shell 1.5: Human-Error Processor. As far as I know, this volume is mostly focused on Batou and Togusa so it'll be a nice change of pace.
FOMO is also one hell of a motivator. I saw the 50th Anniversary PV for Mobile Suit Gundam. Very beautiful, dare I say a love letter to fandom and alterfictionality alike but hey, that's just me. It finally convinced me to get off my ass and start my first anime in the series. I was tempted to start with Witch from Mercury, but I decided to start with Turn A Gundam instead. I recalled a domestic scene I saw online where Loran uses the suit to wash clothes for someone, and I thought it was really cute. If I remember correctly, I left off on Episode 11. I really like it so far! Laura's Cow is such a good episode. I may be early into the show, but it still sticks with me.
I also look forward to the anime adaptations for The Ghost in the Shell and A Witch’s Life in Mongol coming this summer! I’m slightly less anticipating the remake for Magic Knight Rayearth, only because I know Nova won’t be in it. Much like the adaptation for TGITS, I suspect the MKR remake anime is going to be a direct adaptation of the manga.
That's all for now. Until next time, Dreamwidth!
For my next off day, I plan on starting Ghost in the Shell 1.5: Human-Error Processor. As far as I know, this volume is mostly focused on Batou and Togusa so it'll be a nice change of pace.
FOMO is also one hell of a motivator. I saw the 50th Anniversary PV for Mobile Suit Gundam. Very beautiful, dare I say a love letter to fandom and alterfictionality alike but hey, that's just me. It finally convinced me to get off my ass and start my first anime in the series. I was tempted to start with Witch from Mercury, but I decided to start with Turn A Gundam instead. I recalled a domestic scene I saw online where Loran uses the suit to wash clothes for someone, and I thought it was really cute. If I remember correctly, I left off on Episode 11. I really like it so far! Laura's Cow is such a good episode. I may be early into the show, but it still sticks with me.
I also look forward to the anime adaptations for The Ghost in the Shell and A Witch’s Life in Mongol coming this summer! I’m slightly less anticipating the remake for Magic Knight Rayearth, only because I know Nova won’t be in it. Much like the adaptation for TGITS, I suspect the MKR remake anime is going to be a direct adaptation of the manga.
That's all for now. Until next time, Dreamwidth!
See Me As Who I Am Now
Jun. 1st, 2026 08:12 pmdreamdragonEven if I was young and joyful, filled with wonder and awe, innocent. I was naive. I did not know who I am, I did not have the sturdy rhythm of my sense of self, I did not have my dream, solidified and wanting.
I did not lost my wonder and awe, they may be changed, different in tone and hue, but I’ve come to learn them as they’ve come to grow on me, becoming me.
There were the youthful day, perhaps easier, simpler.
Though I would not trade away my progress that is tied with pain and loss. It is through those aches that I learn to appreciate life.
We can look back fondly and think of the good o’ days. But do not think of me fondly in those faded photographs. The gold lacquer that filled my cracks is my triumph. Each piece is picked up and put back together by determined hands and gentle care.
My edge may be jagged now, storm and gloom surrounding me. Still find the gilded, glowing heart within. For I may have put these barriers and dug trenches, I still reach out and yearn for softness and comfort.
Nothing stays the same, but embrace the change, allow me to be different from what you once knew. Grow with me as I grow. Understand me as the world spins with its own chaos.
See me as who I am today.
I did not lost my wonder and awe, they may be changed, different in tone and hue, but I’ve come to learn them as they’ve come to grow on me, becoming me.
There were the youthful day, perhaps easier, simpler.
Though I would not trade away my progress that is tied with pain and loss. It is through those aches that I learn to appreciate life.
We can look back fondly and think of the good o’ days. But do not think of me fondly in those faded photographs. The gold lacquer that filled my cracks is my triumph. Each piece is picked up and put back together by determined hands and gentle care.
My edge may be jagged now, storm and gloom surrounding me. Still find the gilded, glowing heart within. For I may have put these barriers and dug trenches, I still reach out and yearn for softness and comfort.
Nothing stays the same, but embrace the change, allow me to be different from what you once knew. Grow with me as I grow. Understand me as the world spins with its own chaos.
See me as who I am today.
I See You As You Are
Jun. 1st, 2026 08:10 pmdreamdragonI do not care for the past, only if they tell me your story
You could have been different, but that doesn’t matter. The one I know is the you right here, hurt and pain and all. It might have been different, but I appreciate the you now.